New to the estranged campus, 3 freshman girls crowd around a small coffee table. The trendy trio, Kelly, Jaime and Christina, sit and chat in between classes as busy San Jose State student’s crowd them with lattes and laptops. Their Abercrombie sweaters and vans keep them comfortably warm in the cool cafeteria. Conversing over salads and energy drinks the girls are frustrated with having to choose their majors’, choose colleges’ and choosing housing.
“You’re still living at home?” Jaime asks while playing with her iphone.
“Well ya, I wanted to move away but since I’m here my parents’ are making me live at home.” Christina, obviously upset with her position, keeps her head down as she finishes the rest of her turkey salad.
Kelly, the outspoken leader of the group chimes in stating that, “San Jose State was a way better choice then moving down to San Diego. It’s way too big of a party school and there would be way too many distractions.”
After they all agreed that San Jose State was their best choice, they began to discuss how conflicted they were with having to choose they’re major. As Jaime and Kelly sit confidently with their major’s in business, Christina is still unsure about what she wants to do.
“Well, what do you want to do Christina?” Jaime says in between sips of red bull.
“I don’t know. I want to be a housewife when I grow up!” Christina mutters as they all begin to laugh.
“You should choose business. It’s the most basic degree and you can do anything with it. Any job you have is obviously going to be a business. You can also minor in whatever you want. That’s what Jaime and I are doing,” Kelly explains.
After the girls finish discussing college, they make plans to go out for the night. The pressures of college are no match for the close bond between these girls. (322)
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You fixed the quote format, but here's some that you missed:
...three (not 3) freshman girls...
...San Jose State students (it's plural, not possessive "student’s") crowd them with lattes...
...having to choose their majors (not major's), colleges (not college's) and housing.
...choose their (not "they’re") major.
Capitalize Vans, so we know you're referring to the shoes not a vehicle. Capitalize Red Bull -- it's a proper name of a product.
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